Not Well Enough....

You must know by now that my semester break is coming to an end. I'll be moving on to the next chapter of my life.

On retrospect, I cannot help but thank God for the past years.

If there has been a recurrent thought for the past few months, it has to be that which partially engulfs me with fear....

Have I let time pass too quickly?

I know far too many people who are keen on capturing the memorable days in every way possible and have it shared with others. This I believe is commendable and is an area I'm working hard to keep up with myself even with a video camera, digital camera, public and private blog and two notable social networks.

But then, the bigger question would be one that may sound somewhat a cliche:

Have I let time pass with meaningless pursuits? And have I left no stone unturned even as I move on?

So I've completed a reasonable period of time doing medical attachments.

I've resumed piano lessons with a very kind and beautiful lady. It is liberating to know that all hope is not gone. And the confidence I have gained has had a therapeutic effect on me.

I've met with people I've never dreamt of meeting in a lifetime.

I've met friends I will always miss and went places I may never return to.

I've also remembered and honoured my parents even as they commemorated their 25th wedding anniversary. More than the posh restaurant or fancy details, I prefer to remember it as a celebration in which I know I have not forgotten to say anything that I should have said thus far. The words of my Pastor has resonated well and clear.

And in all my inadequacies, I know I've not done some more important things, choosing to wallow in some miseries, doubts, resentments and selfishness.

And no amount of remorse can undo that...